My Mental Health Journey
I have to start by saying this is what worked for me. Everyone has a different story, and a situation or experience might cause your depression or anxiety. Another source can be your hormones or even a genetic predisposition. Please keep these things in mind as you read my story. Try what you think might work for you and consult your doctor about all the rest of it.
My first episode of depression occurred in 2012-2013. I recently graduated from college into an economy that was slowly regaining steam. I was experiencing a lot of rejection. I was also experiencing homelessness.
I don’t say that to dismiss my friends and family who offered me couches, air mattresses, or spare bedrooms to sleep in. It was just the fact of my life at that time. I gained a lot of weight and struggled to find anything to look forward to. I was spiraling; I began having suicidal ideation, and I was sleeping more than I ever had.
One day, I decided to change my life because I was tired of being heavy, sad, and tired. I started taking morning walks. I would take short walks, and I focused on drinking more water. I lost 30lbs in 5 months, and the most intense symptoms of depression faded. However, I was still experiencing anxiety.
I did not have another intense depressive episode until 2017; however, the signs of depression still returned. I think I made it worse by engaging in recreational drugs and alcohol. I was still sleeping a lot, and I wasn’t involved in my relationships with friends or family. My mental health was not where I wanted it to be.
In 2017, I fell into a deep depression. I cried, smoked weed, and slept. Towards the end of the year, I was able to climb out enough to get back to work. The symptoms of depression and anxiety remained. I had intense brain fog, and I wasn’t able to finish my sentences. I was spacing out, and soon after, I had consistent panic attacks.
In January of 2018, I wanted my life to change, so I focused on my spiritual health. I started praying in reading the bible more. I was listening to sermon podcasts and gospel music almost 24/7. While I could find joy in things and engage with my partner, my depression persisted, but the suicidal ideation waned.
In June, I left a job that I hated. The ideations returned intensely; I felt like a failure. The panic attacks were more common. My mental health was in shambles. I leaned into growing my spiritual health, and one day a thought came to me, “change what you are eating.” So I did. I cut out alcohol and caffeine. I quickly saw a change.
In 2019, I put all of it together. I cleaned up the way I was eating; I began exercising. I started with 15 mins and gradually increased to an hour a day over 12 weeks. I lost all the weight I have put on since 2017 and another 10lbs that I frequently struggled with. The following most significant change was therapy.
I began spending more time outside, and I would take hikes and watch things in nature. I started swimming more and interacting with my community. Even when I felt tired, I would still make time to get out with my friends.
Finally, I went back to therapy. I have been going once a week for the last two years. My mental health has only improved with the support of a counselor. I know I have quite a bit of work to do, but I have learned so much.
What therapy taught me?
Going to therapy taught me that I had multiple triggers for my depression and anxiety. I found my voice and the ability to speak up for myself in a way that I never could before.
I learned that my anxiety was triggered by more than my experiences or my negative thoughts. It was my hormonal health and the foods I was eating that heavily contributed to it. I cut out gluten and caffeine completely. I cut down my sugar intake but focusing on drinking less juice and soda and more water.
Therapy taught me it was okay to make time for myself and that listening to my body was the key to protecting my mental health.
Things to consider as you navigate your mental health journey
- Is it your hormones?
I have a PCOS and Hypothyroidism diagnosis. Both of these conditions can contribute to depression and anxiety. If you are in therapy and have changed your diet and exercise habits but you are still experiencing symptoms of depression or anxiety, please talk to a doctor about tests.
- Is it food allergies?
I learned that gluten intolerance and other food allergies could contribute to depression and anxiety. If you are in therapy and your symptoms aren’t improving, consult your doctor about an allergy test.
- Are you still experiencing triggers such as abuse
If you can safely leave an abusive situation, please do so immediately! If you can’t, here is a list of resources to support you on your journey. Be patient with the process. Sometimes you can see an improvement in weeks. Sometimes it takes months. Stick with it.
What Resources Can I use if I don’t have insurance?
Local Universities – While that isn’t the ideal choice, It can be a good resource when you don’t have health insurance or can’t afford other services. Licensed professionals supervise interns, and it can offer you a chance at the help you need.
Online Therapy – I have seen a lot of different online therapy programs that can be helpful. Many of them are affordable, and if you use my link, you can get a 20% discount on your health care.
A weighted Blanket for Anxiety – I have a weighted blanket. It has improved sleep and helps me to settle down when I feel very anxious. This blanket has been beneficial as I manage my mental health.
Vitamins and supplements – I have been taking vitamins to support my immune health and my mental health. Organic Olivia’s Products are among my favorites, and I also really enjoy Ritual.
A new hobby – Finding a hobby that brings you joy, like coloring or painting. Art can be a beneficial tool as well. Music with a happy message or upbeat melody often helped me through difficult moments as well.
No matter where you are on your mental health journey. Please lean into your community. People need people. It was always my people who helped me make the choices that were best for me.
Leave a comment and share what resources have really helped you on your journey to better mental health
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